Monday, November 8, 2010

Five Songs That Make Me Uncomfortable

Writing about Ravel's Bolero in the movie 10 (one of those movies that a guy who grew up in the post-AIDS 1980s finds horrifying) got me thinking about the songs that make me feel just a little bit ... uncomfortable.

Here's my top five (not that you asked):

1. Exile, "I Wanna Kiss You All Over"

What a coincidence: this song was a #1 hit the same year that 10 came out. How could anyone find this sexy?

This is the gold standard. Whenever I hear a song that is overladen with sexual innuendo (or explicit calls to action), it's "I Wanna Kiss You All Over" that I compare it to.

2. John Mayer, "Your Body is a Wonderland" 
This is one of those songs that measured up to Exile's.

3.  Rod Stewart, "Tonight's the Night" 
Another 1970s hit: #1 in 1976. Pete Townshend wrote a short story about this song. I read it when I was 14. It kind of messed me up for a while.

4. Bob Crewe and Kenny Nowland, "My Eyes Adored You"
"... Though I never laid a hand on you." This is just the wrong way to put it, man.

Here's a fun fact: the same people who wrote Frankie Valli's only chart topper (in 1975; what was wrong with people back then?) also wrote "Lady Marmalade."

5. Def Leppard and "Mutt" Lange, "Pour Some Sugar on Me"
What saves this from being totally creepy is the unabashedly exuberant chorus. That, and this: